University of Virginia Library

Drinke and welcome:

OR THE FAMOVS HISTORIE of the most part of Drinks, in use now in the Kingdomes of Great Brittaine and Ireland; with an especiall declaration of the potency, vertue, and operation of our English Ale.

[Thou shalt be from disease and weaknesse free]

Thou shalt be from disease and weaknesse free,
From mone, from care, long time of life to thee
Shall by more friendly fate afforded be:
Drinke Sack therefore if you'l be rul'd by me.

Here followeth, a laborious and effectuall discourse, in praise of the Element of all Waters fresh and salt, with their opperation; with a touch of the causes of all sorts of weather, faire and foule.

I that of Earth was made, yet no earth have,
No not so much as may afford a grave:
For when that death my lives thred shall untwine
I have no buriall in a ground that's mine:
Of all the Elements, the Earth is worst;
Because for Adams sinne it was accurst:
Therefore no parcell of it will I buy
But on the VVater for reliefe relie.
When as mans crying crimes in volleyes flew
To Heaven, and Heavens high vengeance downeward drew:
Then Water all the World did overrunne,
And plagu'd th'abuses that on Earth were done.
From showres of Water, rain'd from Skies to Earth,
Spring, Sommer, Harvest, Winter have their birth.
For VVater is the Milke of Heaven, whereby
All things are nurs'd, increase and multiply.
The oldest and most grave Astronomers,
The learned'st and most sage Philosophers
Doe hold, that in the highest Altitude
A spheare of Water is, in Amplitude
Envelloping all other Orbs and Spheres,
With all the Planets swift and slow careares,
Even as the Sea the Earth doth compasse round,
The Water so the Firmament doth bound.
Should I of Water write, but what it is,
I should be drowned in my Theames Abysse:
And therefore I'le but dabble, wade, and wash,
And here and there both give, and take a dash.
In blest Records it truely is approv'd,
That Gods blest Spirit upon the Waters mov'd:
Then All things were involved in the Waters,
All earthly, Airie, and all firie matters:
Vntill th'Almighty (whose workes all are wonders)
With saying (Let there be) the Chaos sunders.
Of a confus'd lump, voyd of forme and fashion,
He spake, and gave the world its faire creation.
And as at first the Waters compast all
The Chaos, or worlds universall Ball.
So still, of all the workes of God, most glorious
The water was, is, and will be victorious.
It doth surmount the Ayre, the fire it quenches
With Inundations it the Earth bedrenches:
The Fire may burne a house, perhaps a Towne,
But water can a Province spoyle and drowne:
And Ayre may be corrupted, and from thence,
A Kingdome may be plagu'd with pestilence:
Where many die, old, young, some great, some small,
But water flouds plaies sweep-stake with them all.
Earth may be barren, and not yeeld her store:
Yet may she feed the rich, and starve the poore.
But Earth in triumph over all ner'e rid,
As in the Diluge once the Waters did.
Warre may make noyse with Gunnes and ratling Drums,
But Water, where it comes, it overcomes.
Thus Earth, nor Ayre, nor Fire, nor rumbling Warre,
Nor plague, or pestilence, nor famine are
Of powre to winne, where Water but commands,
As witnesse may the watry Netherlands.
Concerning Merchandise, and transportation,
Commerce and traffique, and negotiation,
To Make each Countrie have by Navigation
The Goods, and Riches of each others Nation.
Commodities in free community,
Embassages for warre or unity:
These blessings, by the Sea, or some fresh River
Are given to us, by the All-giving Giver.
And in the vasty and unmeasur'd roome
Of Neptunes Regiment, or Thetis wombe,
Are almost shapes and formes of all the things
Which in the Earth, or Ayre, or dies, or springs.
Ther'e Fishes like to Sunne or Moone, and Starres,
Fowles of the Ayre, and weapons for the Warres,
Beasts of the Field, and Plants and Flowers there,
And Fishes made like Men and Women are.
All instruments for any Art or Trade,
In living formes of Fishes there are made.
This is approv'd, if any man will seeke
In the first day of Bartas his first weeke,
Heaven hath ordain'd the watry Element
To be a Seale and sacred Sacrament,
Which doth in Baptisme us regenerate,
And man againe with God doth renovate.
And as it in the Laver (mysticall)
Doth cleanse us from our sinne originall:
So for our corp'rall uses 'tis most meete
To wash our cloathes, and keepe us cleane and sweet.
Wer't not for Water thus we plainelie see,
No Beast on Earth more beastly were than wee.
Our selves with nastinesse our selves should smother,
Or with our owne stench poyson one another.
It keepes our vessels cleane to dresse our meate,
It serves to cleanse and boile the meate we eate.
It makes our houses hansome, neate and cleane,
(Or else the mayd is but a fluttish queane)
Thus Water boyles, parboyles, and mundifies.
Cleares, cleanses, clarifies, and purifies.
But as it purges us from filth and stincke;
We must remember that it makes us drinke,
Metheglin, Bragget, Beere, and headstrong Ale,
(That can put colour in a visage pale)
By which meanes many Brewers are growne Rich,
And in estates may soare a lofty Pitch,
Men of Good Ranke and place, and much command
Who have (by sodden Water) purchast land:
Yet sure I thinke their gaine had not been such
Had not good fellowes vs'de to drinke too much;
But wisely they made hay whilst Sunne did shine,
For now our Land is overflowne with wine:
With such a Deluge, or an Inundation
As hath besotted and halfe drown'd our Nation.
Some that are scarce worth 40 pence a yeere
Will hardly make a meale with Ale or Beere:
And will discourse, that wine doth make good blood,
Concocts his meat, and make digestion good,
And after to drinke Beere, nor will, nor can
He lay a Churle upon a Gentleman.
Thus Bacchus is ador'd and deifide,
And We Hispanializ'd and Frenchifide:
Whilst Noble Native Ale, and Beeres hard fate
Are like old Almanacks, Quite out of Date;
Thus men consume their credits and their wealths,
And swallow sicknesses, in drinking healths,
Untill the fury of the spritefull Grape
Mounts to the braine, and makes a man an Ape,
A Sheepe, Goate, Lion, or a Beastly swine,
He snores, besoyl'd with vomit and much Wine.
At Good mens Boords, where oft I eate good cheere,
I finde the Brewer honest in his Beere.
He sels it for small Beere, and he should cheate,
In stead of small to cosen folks with Greate.
But one shall seldome find them with that fault,
Except it should invisibly raine Mault.
O Tapsters, Tapsters all, lament and cry,
Or desp'rately drinke all the Tavernes dry:
For till such time as all the Wine is gone,
Your are bewitch'd, and guests you shall have none.
Then to the Tavernes hye you every man:
In one day drinke foure Gallons, if you can,
And with that tricke (within a day or twaine)
I thinke there will but little Wine remaine.
Your hopes to hoppes returne againe will be,
And you once more the golden age will see.
But hold, I feare my Muse is mad or drunke,
Or else my wits are in the wetting shrunk:
To Beere and Ale my love hath some relation
Which made me wander thus beyond my station.
Good Reader be my Priest, I make confession,
I pray thee pardon me, my long digression.
From Beere and Wine to water now a while,
I meane to metamorphose backe my stile.
Wer't not for Water, sure the Dyers would die,
Because they wanted wherewithall to dye.
Cost would be lost, and labour be in vaine,
'Tis Water that must helpe to die in Graine.
They could then feare no colours, it is cleare,
Want water, and there will be none to feare.
The Fishmongers, (a worthy Company)
If VVater did not still their Trade supply,
They would be Tradefalne, and quite downe be trod,
Nor worth the head or braine-pan of a Cod.
Then Lent and Ember-weekes would soone be shotten,
All fasting daies would quickly be forgotten:
Carthusian Friers, in superstitious Cloysters
VVould want their sttirring Cockles, Crabs and Oysters:
And Catholicks turne Puritanes straight way,
And nevermore keepe Lent or fasting day.
But leaving Neptune, and his Trumping Triton,
Of other VVaters now I meane to write on,
(Exhal'd by Phœbus from the Ocean maine)
Of Clowdes, of misty Fogs, all sorts of Raine,
Of Dew, of Frosts, of Haile, of Ice of Snow
VVhich falls, and turnes to water here below,
Of Snow and Raine, as they together meet
VVell mingled in the Ayre, are called Sleet.
Of Springs, of petty Rils, of Chrystall Founts,
Of Streamelets here my merry Muse recounts;
Of Foordes, of Brookes, of Rivers, Lakes and Bournes;
Of Creekes, of Ebbes and flouds, and their returnes,
Of Gulphs, ponds, Whirlpooles, Puddles, Ditches, Pooles,
Of Moates, of Bathes, some hot, and some that cooles,
Of Waters, bitter, sweet, fresh, salt, hot, cold,
Of all their operations manifold;
These (if I can) I'le mention with my Pen
And last of Urin and strong Watermen.

Of Clouds.

A Cloud's a Vapour, which is cold and moyst,
Which from the Earth, or Sea, the Sunne doth hoyst
Into the middle Region of the Ayre,
And is (by extreame cold) congealed there,
Untill at last, it breake and fals againe,
To Earth, or Sea, in snow, sleet, Haile or Raine.

Of Mists.

Mists are such clouds, which neere the earth doe lye,
Because the sun wants strength to draw them high.
When radiant Sol displaies his piercing Beames

Of Raine.

Into a cloud, it Thawes, and Raines, in streames:
And as the cloud is distant neere or farre,
So, great, or small the showrie droppes still are.
Some men ('gainst Raine) doe carry in their backs
Prognosticating Aking Almanacks:
Some by a painefull elbow, hip, or knee,
Will shrewdly guesse, what wether's like to be:
Some by their cornes are wondrous Weather-wise,
And some by biting of Lice, Fleas, or Flies:
The Gowt, Sciatica, The Gallian Morbus,
Doth oft foretell if Tempests shall disturbe us;
For though these things converse not with the stars,
Yet to Mans Griefe they are Astronomers;
In Spring time, and in Autumne Phœbus Ray
From land and sea drawes vapours in the day,
Which to th'Ayres lowest Region he exhales,

Dew.

And in the night in pearly dew it fals.
Here oft fall Meldewes, sweet as Hony; And
Dew oft turnes Manna in Polonia land.
Twixt Dew and Hoare-frost, all the ods, I hold

Hoare frosts

One comes from heate, the other from the cold.
Hayle is an Ice which oft in flawes and stormes

Hayle.

In spring and Harvest fals, in sundry formes;
For in the Autumne, Winter, or by night
Scarce any Hayle within our land doth light.
And last comes Snow, the cold'st of Winters Weathers,

Snow.

Which fals and fils the Ayre with seeming feathers.
These from the land, and from the Ocean Maine,
The Sun drawes up, and then lets fall againe.
Thus water universally doth fly
From Earth and skie to Sea, from them to Sky:
For 'twixt the Firmament, the land and Ocean,
The Water travels with perpetuall Motion.
Now, from the Airy Regions I descend,
And to a lower course my study bend:
He that of these things would know more, may please
To looke them in some Ephimerides.
Springs, (in the Earth) I doe Assimulate

Springs.

To veines of Man, which doe evacuate,
And drop by drop through Cavernes they distill,
Till many meetings make a petty Rill:
Which Rill (with others) doe make Rivolets,
And Rivolets, Brookes, Bournes and foords begets,
And thus combined, they their store deliver
Into a deeper trench, and make a River.
Then Rivers joyne, as Isis doth with Tame,

Rivers.

And Trent with Owse, and Humber doth the same.
These altogether doe their Tributes pay
Unto their soveraigne Ocean night and day.
These make Dame Tellus wombe to fructifie,
As blood in veines of men doe life supply.
Lakes in low vallied Grounds have Generation,

Lakes

Or from some severall Rivers Inundation.
Some Lakes seeme Oceans, amongst which are these
The Dead-lake, Hircan, and the Caspian seas.
A Whirpooles like unto state policy
Not to be sounded, but with jeopardy.
Hot Bathes doe spring from Brimstone veines, whose heat
For many cures have opperetion great.
Some minerall earth is bitter, and doth make
The water issuing thence, that taste to take.
In Scicily, they say, there is a VVell
VVhose water doth for Vinegar serve well.
A VVell neere Bilen in Bohemia lies
VVhich (like burnt VVine) the Countrey there supplies.
And divers springs in Germany there be,
VVhose taste with Vinegar, or VVine agree.
For there the Brimstone mines, and Minerals
VVith Fumes infusing vapours up exhales
And with the waters doe incorporate
Hot, cold, sweet, sowre, as they ennaccuate.
Some Rivers are of such strange working might,
VVhich dranke (by sheepe) doth change them black from white,
Some that with bathing cure, blind, deafe, and lame,
And makes mens haire red that doe drinke the same,
Some are at noone key-cold, at midnight hot,
Some makes a man mad, some a drunken sot,
Some are in summer cold, in winter warme,
And some are banefull, full of poysn'ous harme.
Some (do with lust) make mens affections burne,
And some (through coldnesse) wood to stones will turne,
Some will quench burning torches straite, and then
Dip'd in the water they are light agen,
I read that in Silicia one may finde
A well which if Thieves drinke of, are strucke blinde,
My selfe, and many thousands more than I
Would (rather then to drinke thereof be drie.)
If Brittaines waters all were such, I thinke
That few of us would dare thereof to drinke:
I could write more of strange wells opp'rations:
And waters of our owne and other Nations.
But Doctour Fulk of late hath writ a booke,
Of Met'ors, and who lifts therein to looke,
May read, and reading may be well suffic'd,
So learnedly he hath Epitomiz'd.
There are two Springs, which women (when they mump)
Or lumpish lowring from their eyes can pumpe,
And in those pearly streames the foole, and witty,
Hath oftentimes beene duck'd or sous'd with pity:
Kinde hearted men are drown'd in sorrow deepe
When they doe see a handsome woman weepe.
But Aprill like, soone dry and quickly wet
(As anger, love, or hate doe rise or set,)
But as for those that truely spring from griefe,
I wish them consolation and Reliefe.
Now (to ecclips the vigour of the Vine)
We have strong waters, stronger much than Wine:
One with a quart of water drunke may be,
When (of the best wine) he may hold out three,
The sellers of these waters seldome row,
And yet they are strong-water-men, I know.
Some water-men there are of sight so quicke,
They'l tell by water if a man be sicke,
And (through the urinall) will speedily
Finde out the cause, the griefe and remedy.
These men deserve much honour, love and thankes.
But hang base pispot cheating Mountebankes.
'Twere fit the Ratcatchers with them should be,
Combin'd in one, and at one Hall made free.
I could speake why the sea doth ebbe and flow,
And why 'tis salt, but Doctour Fulke doth show
Compendiously, as I have said before;
And therefore here I'le touch these poynts no more.
Month changing Luna, hath the government
O're all the various watry element,
And as the Moone is mutable even so
The waters still are turning to and fro:
'Tis smooth, 'tis rough, deepe, shallow, swift and slow,
Whose motion doth perpetuall ebbe and flow:
Most weake, most strong, most gentle, most untam'd
Of all the creatures that were ever nam'd:
It is so weake that children may it spill,
And strong enough millions of men to kill:
As smooth as Glasse, as Rugged as a Beare,
Weake, and yet greatest burthens still doth beare,
And as the waters from the Moone doth carry
Her inclination, and like her do vary:
So I (a Water-man) in various fashions,
Have wroate a hotchpotch here of strange mutations,
Of ancient liquors, made by Liber Pater,
Of drinkes, of Wines, of sundry sorts of Water:
My Muse doth like a Monkey friske and frigge,
Or like a Squirrell skip, from twigge to twigge:
Now sipping Sider, straightway supping Perry,
Metheglin sweet, and Mead, (that makes her merry)
VVith Braggot, tharein teach a Cat to speake,
And poore Pomperkin (impotent and weake)
And lastly (as the chiefe of all the rest)
She tipples Huff-cap Ale, to crowne the feast,
Yet now and then in Beere and Balderdash
Her lips she dips; and cleane her entrailes wash:
And ending, she declares Sack's mighty power,
VVhich doth time, coyne, wit, health, and all devoure.
Not by the mod'rate use, but by th'abuse
Which daily is in universall use.
For Rhenish, Claret, White, and other Wines
They need not the expression of my lines;
Their vertue's good, if not commix'd impure,
And (as they'r us'd) they may both kill or cure.
Through drinks, through wines, and waters, I have run,
And (being dry and sober.) I have